Guest Post: Searching for Sitters

Guest writer: Frances Siino, Ed. M.

When it comes to finding the right babysitter, mothers (and fathers) may face some challenges along the way. I always figured that, once I had kids, it would be easy to find a caregiver...just find a teenager who wants to make some extra cash, right?

Sure, it is easy to find a sitter, but it is not always easy to find THE RIGHT sitter for your family. After having each of my kids, I suffered with anxiety and depression, so leaving my kids in someone else’s hands became an even bigger challenge for me. It was hard to trust anyone with what I felt was supposed to be MY task. I felt a lot of guilt, and, so I wanted to be sure my kids were in PERFECT hands while I was gone. My worst fear was something bad happening to my kids and feeling as if it could have been prevented had I been home. While it is unrealistic to find someone perfect, there are ways to help yourself make the right decision.

First, I would certainly suggest asking friends or family members for recommendations. When you go this route, you can at least have a frame of reference and get an idea of who this person is. When my daughter was first born, we were not sure where to start, so I made a post on my Facebook page. A coworker (and good friend of mine) suggested I reach out to her son’s girlfriend, which worked out well for us! She was sweet and responsible, and I felt comfortable knowing she was basically a part of my friend’s family.

If you can’t find any recommendations that route, you may have to use an online network like care.com or sittercity.com. I am sure there are more out there, but these are the two I used when our sitter went off to college. By this time, I was pregnant with my son and in the process of moving, so I felt like I was starting over from scratch. I decided to try the online route, and, while it worked out in the end, it was not an easy process. For example, I learned the hard way to NEVER give a site user your personal email when first communicating. You can communicate safely on the site, but once you give out your personal information, it’s out there. I had a “potential sitter” (really a scammer) use my email and profile picture to set up a dating profile on a sleazy website!! YUP! I was able to hash that out, but in the meantime, I still had to meet with some actual potential babysitters.

I had some no-shows and some who cancelled at the last minute. I had someone tell me off because she was offended I wanted to meet in a public place. I had someone come to the home and overstay her welcome---she couldn’t leave because she needed to wait for her ride to come and pick her up (which is when I learned that reliable transportation may be something to include when looking for a reliable sitter). In the end, we were lucky enough to find Alex through care.com. She happens to be one of the most amazing people I have ever met. She is as patient as they come, loving, genuine, fun, brilliant, mature...I can go on and on.

I did not know much about her, but since my husband was going to be home, I asked her to come to the house. Immediately I knew she would be a great fit for our family. She spent some time with us that evening and got to meet the kids. (Side-note---I think it is important to watch someone interact with your kids before leaving them alone. A mother’s instinct will always guide you). I did ask for references in order to verify some information and to see what other employers had to say about Alex, but it only helped me confirm what I already knew in my heart.

Lastly, we would never have had the pleasure of getting to know Alex, had we not taken that difficult step towards admitting we needed help. It is okay to feel overwhelmed as a parent, and it is okay to ask for or find help. Sometimes we need to get a break from our kids in order to recharge and regroup. Knowing my kids are in good hands when I leave the house allows me to enjoy whatever it is I am doing for myself, which helps me enjoy my kids more when I am home.

I wish everyone good luck during your babysitting adventures! Remember to follow your original instincts...they are there to help!

~Frances Siino, Ed. M.

Mommy ❤ Teacher ❤ Author