Updated: Apr 28
Hello everyone! It has been a hot minute since I’ve written my last blog post but I am so happy to be back with a new one for you all today. Today, I wanted to take the time to speak on my season of waiting and what it looked like for me specifically. I am choosing to talk about this part of my life because there aren't many people who spend time explaining the reality of this season. Waiting, in general, is hard.
When you're waiting for something specific from God, it’s even more challenging. As you read about my season of waiting, I pray that it encourages you in your season because it is absolutely worth it. These words of encouragement are coming from a girl who doubted God and questioned if He even remembered her in her time of loneliness. But, if He could do it for me, I believe that He can do it for you as well.
When I say “my season of waiting”, I am specifically talking about waiting for my Boaz (Ruth 2-4), A man that will love and sacrifice for me as Christ did for the church (Ephesians 5:25-28). Shortly after my breakup, I told God I wanted to bounce back. I no longer wanted to dwell on the betrayal but wanted a fresh start and I wanted it quickly. I specifically said to Him that I would like to start dating six months after my breakup. Looking back, that was really silly of me to say for one simple but important reason. I was not ready. As much as I wanted to convince myself that I was, I was lying through my teeth big time.
I wasn’t emotionally over my last relationship and was very much still in love, which is why dating six months after heartbreak was not realistic for me. So do you know what God did instead? Instead of the six months I had initially asked for, God put me through a season of waiting for about five YEARS. Yupp! You read correctly. Years, not months. If I’m being honest, those years were very tough. One minute I would be filled with hope for the future and what’s to come then be defeated and discouraged within seconds. For years, I was going through a roller coaster of emotions. I questioned and doubted if God had my season of waiting truly worked out for my good and His glory. I started to lose hope that I would find love again. At one point, I related to the people of Israel and felt as though I should've stayed in my version of Egypt.
My faith was running out on this particular part of my life and I started to think that maybe believing in God for someone better was asking for too much. I was putting limits on a limitless God. My season of waiting definitely tested my faith. It was one of the most challenging seasons of my life because I had to decide whether or not I would stop trying to “help” God and just submit to the season He had called me to be in. The crazy part about this whole story is that God had already revealed to me who I would end up with before and throughout my season! Now that’s another story for another day but can you imagine my frustration? I knew who my person was but couldn't do anything about it unless God gave me His permission.
I got to a point where I decided that I was done playing tug of war with God. He was winning anyway. I relinquished my forms of control and said with finality ‘God, if you want it, you’ll do it’. The moment I decided to let go and let God, He began to move on my behalf. God started to make a way out of no way. He opened my eyes so I could finally see what He had planned for me all along. God gave me the most precious gift; a gift that I never intend to neglect, lose, or abuse. All I can say today is to God be the glory. He has proven his faithfulness to me once again.
If you are currently in a season of waiting for your Boaz or your Ruth and find yourself getting frustrated, here is my advice to you. First, invite God into ALL of it. Talk to God about your highs and lows during your season. There were times where I told God that I couldn't do this waiting thing anymore. I was afraid of being honest with Him but God took my honesty and showed me grace. He already knows how we feel and sometimes, He’s just waiting on us to express that we need Him. Believe me, when I say this, God is not afraid nor intimidated by what you are going through. He has the power to change your life in a matter of a second. Take this time that you have now to ask God to prepare you for what’s to come.
There were times when I found myself praying for the kind of husband that I wanted and how I wanted him to treat me but as time passed, I found myself not praying as hard about my preparation to be a wife someday. If patience is what you're lacking, pray for more of it. If you aren't the best communicator, pray that God instills healthy communication skills in you. Wherever you lack as a man or woman, ask God to supply so you can be at your best when the time comes for you to be with someone you hope to share life with. Sometimes we aren’t receiving the man or woman we hope and pray for because we lack preparation. Lastly, I want you to know that your feelings are valid and you are not crazy for feeling the way that you do. You are not the only one waiting for a move from God to happen in your life.
I pray that this blog encourages you to seek God during your season of waiting, whether it's for a man, woman, car, house, etc. I also pray that this gave you some form of hope that God hasn't forgotten about you and your situation. Do not settle for anything or anyone less than God’s best. May the God of abundance bless you and keep you both now and forevermore! Thank you for reading.
“Wait patiently for the Lord. Be brave and courageous.
Yes, wait patiently for the Lord.”
- Psalm 27:14